Been having some conflict in my head lately. Not 100% why....but something to do with thinking about the way I felt last year at this time, compared to how I feel this year. It's totally differant and I love it and I hate it and everything in between.

Have not been able to sleep well because of it. I think too much and thinking keeps me awake...and yet I dont even know what I'm really thinking about. Something about it must be bugging me more then I think. I have woken up twice with tears in my eyes...and I dont know if I'm actually crying or not...but in the morning I have so much sleep in my eyes that I can hardly open them, and I know that is a symptom (for lack of a better word) of crying, from previous crying experience.

At any rate, I think I feel better now, talked to a friend last night and she helped me. Stuff she said made me make more since of it in my head and figure out what I was actually feeling, so thanks! And I also talked to a friend tonight about it a little (which is odd for me, I actually kinda opened up to someone I'm not super close to) and he said he thought I was awesome for how I handle things and for what I am accomplishing and such, so that made me feel better too.

I'm just ready for school to start back up, so I can keep my mind on that... and kick its ass again!

P.S. Keifer is on Conan tonight...HOORAY!!!